Damn dirty apes

Charlton Heston, dead at 84

Charlton Heston, a.k.a. Moses, a.k.a. Judas Ben Hur, a.k.a. the Soylen Green dude, a.k.a. the Planet of the Apes dude, a.k.a. El Cid, a.k.a. the NRA Prez, a.k.a. Andrew Jackson is no more. A living monument of Hollywood, Heston played larger-than-life figures with vim and gusto throughout his career.

Paramedics called to Heston’s Los Angeles home late last night confirmed that he had passed away, then took the shotgun he clutched from his cold, dead hands.

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